Life Goes On

A few days before the new year, I realized I was upset and by no means excited for New Years Eve. I distinctly remember my sister, over the last family dinner in 2005 saying "2006 will be a good year for all of us". I thought about what she had said, and became excited, I agreed with her 100%. I was going abroad, my parents were beginning the building of their new house, and as for my sister, work was going really well and she was starting over after ending a long term relationship. Well, where did 06 go? Where did Australia go? The piece of land my parents owned for almost 10 years now bears an almost finished house and more so than that .... a new home. I feel like 2006 was a short lived dream. I feel like Australia never happened, I feel like I never left. 2007 terrifies me. 2007 is full of the unknown. Where will I be come May? What will I be doing? Will I be happy? Will I still be hanging on to what I'm hanging onto now, or will I burn a bridge or 2 that I worked so hard to build?

At the same time, I wonder, why do we put ourselves through this? What is all the hype of distinguising between different years? Why do we wait for the new year to come up with and start resolutions?

This is the first year that I've really wondered and contemplated where I'll be, emotionally and mentally in a year's time. And I wonder if that's because I want to be as far away from where I am now as possible.